Children Are Listening

As noted, Mrs Neu learned a lot from Nora Sterling at DPNS. One of the key things she learned from Nora is how to talk about, talk to and talk with children. Here is an excerpt about this from her memoir draft.

I participated in the [DPNS] program weekly with Legend, Nora Sterling. Not only did she help train me to be an effective parent, she changed my way of teaching forever. I had taught first grade 5 years before I had children--she helped me know that the relationships I had with my students was far more powerful than the curriculum. She helped me learn how to talk about, talk to, and talk with children. Over the years, classes I took, and the reading I did confirmed her wisdom. I have spent almost fifty years working with children ages four to seven and I am going to share some of our wisdom.

A special event happened last week right outside the school when I came to pick up my neighbor's little boy, I was standing under the overhang out of the rain with another mother who was holding about a two year old. Another mother came in and greeted both me, the mother and the little boy. She proceeded to have a conversation with them both.

This is far from the norm. I have often noticed how many times a child seems to be invisible in a conversation.This can be a serious problem when an adult talks about their child as though the child can't hear, or about another child as if a child present is not listening. "My child just won’t eat vegetables," they might say, "I try and try but it can’t be done." The listening child is thinking, no vegetables for me.

It is very important to be careful what you say about your listening child. Don’t let the child be invisible. If you are meeting with a teacher, or a doctor about problems, don’t discuss these problems unless the child can be included in the conversation, or, if not, ask to speak together without the child there. ALWAYS BE AWARE that a near child could be listening to you talk. What are your words telling the child?

More on talking to children to come ...